I don’t know about you, but I’ve always had this internal battle with myself. This feeling of wanting to do something or feeling like I deserve something and in the back of my mind feeling like I can’t. It’s that feeling of battling against myself. Basically like there is Me…and then there is Him.
He’s always been there trying to tell me “no that’s not possible”, “why would you want to do that”, “that’s not something that you can do”. I’ve always had to fight against that feeling I would not be able to do it. He’s in my subconscious, he is my doubts, he is there trying to prevent my constant striving for greatness. He’s like a shadow trying to loom over me.
Several times, I had this conversation: “I want to go out tonight, I know I will have a good time.” In the back of my mind he’s there saying, “Well what if you don’t.”
Overall, I have started winning my battles against him, but I have to remember that he is a part of who I am. So the battle may not be Me Vs Him, but it a battle to remain positive and continue to grow. When He gets in the way of my growth we will be in conflict, but I will never let him decide if I am good enough.
I am Him and I must be at peace with that.